YOU HAVE NICE TITS!! Picking up SEXY Girls!!!
Darren remembers accompanying his father out shopping in the toy department of Hamleys one Christmas Eve.
Dad said, “What a marvelous train set. I’ll buy it.”
The girl behind the counter looked pleased and murmured, “Great, I’m sure your son will really love it.”
Dad replied with a glint in his eye, “Maybe you’re right. In that case I’ll take two.”
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And last, a dirty Christmas joke 😀
Santa Claus makes his way down the chimney, and is met by a lovely young woman in a robe.
She says, “Santa, how about giving me a special present. I know you’d like to come into my bedroom.”
Santa responds, “Ho! Ho! Ho! Gotta go. Gotta go. Gotta deliver all these toys to the children you know.”
The lovely young thing peels off her robe, revealing a skimpy negligee. Santa looks up from his sack of gifts, and she says, “I’ve got something special for you Santa. Can’t you stay for just a little while? I know you want me. Let me make this Christmas eve unforgetable.”
Santa responds, “Ho! Ho! Ho! Gotta go. Gotta go. Gotta deliver all these toys to the children you know.”
Not to be denied, she strips off the negligee, revealing her naughty bits, and they were quite nice naughty bits, I might add. And she says, “Santa, this is your last chance. This body is your gift.”
Santa responds “Hey! Hey! Hey! Gotta stay. Gotta Stay. Can’t get up the chimney with my c*ck this way!!!”
Father William, the old priest, made it a practice to visit the parish school one day a week. He walked into the 4th grade class, where the children were studying the states, and asked them how many states they could name. They came up with about 40 names.
Father William jokingly told them that in his day students knew the names of all the states. One lad raised his hand and said, Yes sir, but in those days there were only 13 states.
4th of July Facts:
The 4th of July was not declared a national holiday until 1941.
When the United States became a country in 1776, there were approximately 2.5 million people living in the country. This Fourth of July 2013, the population is around 313.2 million.
The youngest signer of the Declaration of Independence was 26-year-old Edward Rutledge. The oldest signer was Benjamin Franklin. He was 70. Most of the signers were in their 30s and 40s.
The American flag was adopted on June 14, 1777.
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